Skip to main content

A few things I've learned as a mom

 Today is Mother's Day. Honestly, it's one of my least favorite days of the year...for many reasons. For example, why do we need a Mother's Day in the first place? Shouldn't mothers be honored and loved 365 days a year? And don't we realize how painful this day is to so many out there? Those who have lost their mothers or their children...those who desperately want to be a mom but for whatever reason cannot...those who have had a falling out with their mom or their child...and so many more. I don't know. Mother's Day, Father's Day, and Valentines Day are three days that I am convinced we would be better off without. But enough of my cynicism. 

The point is: I am a mother. I have been one since 1995 (so like, a really long time!). Today I can proudly proclaim that I have seen three of my four children become adults and have babies of their own. My baby, the last one who is not legally an adult yet, will hit that milestone in just three months! This means I have survived infancy, terrible twos, kindergarten separation, grade school, middle school, teenage blues, and everything in between four times! And because of this "experience", I want to share a few insights for anyone else out there on this beautiful and painful journey we call "motherhood".

1- Love your kids every chance you get. 

I know, I know. Everyone tells you this and everyone says, "with a blink of an eye, they're all grown up!". Well...that's because it is true! I know that right now you might feel like you will be stuck with this horrible, whiny, tantrum throwing two-year-old (or is it a 16-year-old?) for the rest of your life. But you won't. So love them nonstop. And while you're at it, when you're super frustrated with your little one or your teen, wait until they fall asleep and then just watch them for a few minutes. Look at that sweet, peaceful face and remember that this little human is a gift for you to cherish. 

2- Listen to your kids every chance you get. Now, I don't mean listening to them fight with one another and I don't mean spy on them when they're with their friends. I simply mean listen. When they are talking to you about their day in kindergarten and you can't really follow the story, listen. When they are explaining the video game they love to you and your eyes feel like glazing over in boredom, listen. When they are telling you about that really cute boy that smiled at them and you feel like pulling out your shotgun, listen. Just let them know that you are always available to listen to them. And that their voice matters.

3- Along with #2, Ask your kids questions every chance you get. 

Questions like "how was your day?" or "what did you think about that movie?" or "where would you like to go on vacation if you could go anywhere?". Ask them anything that can open up a conversation with them. And then, well, go back to #2!

4- Just be there for them every chance you get. 

This gets more and more important the older the kids get. If your kids know that they can count on you to be there for them, then they will be much less likely to seek others who may not be the greatest influence. This means showing up to as many sporting or extracurricular events as possible, watching a funny movie with them when they need to laugh or even just holding them when they need it (no matter how old they are). 


This list could probably go on and on but I think these four are key. I know that I am guilty of not doing these things enough with my babies, but I am glad I still have the rest of their lives to do them. Enjoy being a mom (or dad or aunt or uncle or human) and add a little more love to their lives and to the world!




Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"All that to say..." Series!

 Ok, folks! I have decided that I enjoy reading things and then writing my thoughts down on what I read. That can be a book, a news article, an op-ed, a chapter in a textbook...whatever. So, since I am so entertaining (at least to myself), I thought I would share my thoughts with ya'll! Stay tuned here on this blog for upcoming "All that to say..." posts! And if you like what you read, please subscribe to the blog and share it with your friends. Also, comments are always welcome on any of my posts. I just ask that you act civilized toward one another...or I will prove to you that I am a mom and put you in time-out.  I know that some of my posts may ruffle political feathers of one side or another...or both. Also, I should add this disclaimer: If I post something that you do not agree with, there is no need to criticize my opinion or to unfriend or unfollow me or what have you. We can have civilized discussions about our difference in opinion. Comment your thoughts and I w

All that to say...don't mess with my gas!

Last week, I read an  article  about how the big three oil companies all came under fire for their lack of action in the “climate battle”. It caught my attention because the night before I read the article, I noticed the prices at the local gas stations had gone up to over $3 a gallon! That was like a  30-cent  jump in just a couple of days! When I first saw the higher prices, I thought maybe we were seeing the remnants of the effects of that  cyber-attack on the Colonial pipeline  or maybe the gas stations were just raising prices in anticipation of Memorial Day weekend.    But then my cynical brain got to thinking otherwise. I began to wonder if the gas prices have anything to do with Exxon, Chevron, and Shell getting “mud on their face”, as Mr. Mercury so eloquently put it. I t just seems a little more than coincidence that these big oil companies got “bullied” one day all over the media and the next day the prices at the pump drastically increase.   Of course, I am far from an eco

Great Lakes Tour - Part 3

Welcome back to the final leg of our Great Lakes tour of 2018!  It has been such a blast to share these great vacation memories with everyone but I do have a disclaimer to add to this trip, and I probably should have included it in the other two posts as well. I may have cast Maria in a less than agreeable light during this trip. However, there was a good reason for it, even though at that time I only had slight suspicions. Maria was about two months pregnant with Giovanni at this time and was not feeling well at all, but was also trying to not let on about her "condition". So, with hindsight, I understand her crankiness. A side note to that disclaimer is that Ben is not mad in all of the pictures, he just tries intentionally to not smile in any picture. But no matter what, I still really enjoyed being able to take such a memorable trip with both of my youngest babies! So, lets wrap this trip up, shall we? Day 5: We packed up and began heading south through Ontario towards Ni